Email: "Donít know how to start"?
Here are a couple ideas:
- Your profile IS your first impression made to potential friends. When looking over your profile to spruce it up a little, think
about what YOU look for when scanning through other profiles. What
do you look for? What turns you off when reading other profiles?
- Most people don't read entire profiles (at first). What you say
in your first essay question pretty much tells your story. People
tend to read more once they know there is interest from both sides.
- Profiles without photos generally don't do as well as profiles
with photos. ( Do not use a porn shot as your primary photo
- your profile will be deleted ) FACE PHOTOS -- If you are new
and worried about photos at first, we suggest that you
and other photos that don't really identify your face. If you use
face shots, blur the eye-line or use pixilated faces so you can
be recognized. This is very easy to do in just about any photo
manipulation program. In any case, you need photos to succeed.
You probably will skip profiles yourself when looking for other
couples to meet if there is no photos... right? Just makes it look
like you are serious and people will not just be wasting time talking
- SINGLES - NO DICK PHOTOS AS YOUR MAIN
PROFILE PHOTO!! Your profile will be deleted.
WEB ADDRESSES OR E-MAIL ADDRESSES IN YOUR PROFILE! You
will just get deleted and loose all of the forward movement
to get top this point. And yes we know about "dot com" and all
of the other bypasses. We have programs that look for web addresses,
no matter how you
that collect e-mail addresses and SPAM you from posting them on
your essay. Guess who gets blamed for the SPAM mail after you sign-up
and immediately start getting SPAM mail... we do.
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- Make sure you read their profile first so you can see what the
other member is all about!
- Put them on your WISH LIST so they can see you are interested.
They may be more outgoing than you are.
- Send a nice email saying hello and that you liked their profile
and are interested in meeting them. (include a photo)
- You can include some stuff about yourselves and maybe send a
picture showing your bodies so the other member has an idea generally
what you look like. Faces are not required here. Wait for the answer.
- When asking questions of another member, answer the same questions
in your text when communicating with the other member.
- When you do receive e-mails from other members, be sure to give
common courtesy and write them back and express your interest,
or tell people you are not interested in a simple "No Thanks." Be
polite, nobody likes to be ignored.
Once you make communication by e-mail, get phone numbers and chat
on the phone before your meeting to make sure both people are cool
with this. Sometimes you will be communicating with a couple where
the one side or the other does not know about the Lifestyle, or the
meeting. You need to avoid these meetings.
The first meeting:
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- Local Club or Dance Party Event. These are particularly
good for first meetings, plenty to see and do. New couples should
always try to locate the local Swing Clubs, Meet & Greets and
Dance Parties. These are great places to get your feet wet in the
Lifestyle and see if this is the correct recreation for you. There
is generally no pressure at these events to participate in anything,
you will get known by others as being real enough to attend events,
and you will get to see what the other members look like in real-time.
- Dinner is always a great way to get to know another couple,
but can be awkward if you don't like the couple! The one-on-one
face time at dinner without loud music drowning out your conversation
really advances your friendship... or lack of. You might want to
start off with meeting for drinks. Meeting for drinks has less
of a time requirement than a full-blown dinner engagement. If the
other couple is less than attractive, you really can't walk out
of a dinner with grace. Couple of drinks and you can say... "Well
gotta go." If both couples are having a great time, you can
retire to either home, or continue the evening someplace local
- Meeting by Web Cam really cuts to the chase. You can actually
see the couple on the other end and do fun performances for them
if the feeling is there. No fakes on Webcam... you are what you
- Face-To-Face is always the best way to meet people. It's
the chemistry that really counts. They can be the hottest looking
couple and when you meet they may be the least social people you
have ever met or just "not do anything" for you. Once
you are face-to-face with another couple and chat for a while,
you will know right away if you are going to hit it off or not.
- Be sure to tell the truth about what you are looking for. Nobody
likes spend time with people only to find out they are not what
they advertise in the way of experience and desires. If you are
not ready -- thinking about it -- or just ready to play at your
level, this is OK as long as your tell people up front what you
are all about.
Hints for your first visit to a swing club
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- First things first... be sure to always bring your own lube and
condoms. Even if your not intending on participating its better
to be safe than sorry. Always bring one or two non-latex condoms.
Some women can't deal with latex.
- Make sure you talk the evening out with your mate. Know what
your limits are and set signals you both recognize when you become
uncomfortable or don't like another couple. (time to move along
- Only go to a Swing Club or Social Event with a good attitude.
Any problems with your relationship will be amplified, not fixed!
- When going to a swing club you are not forced to participate
in any activities. You can just watch if you so desire. You will
have the best time if you relax and see what happens. When chemistry
is there, you will know it.
- Lots of people use the clubs as a way to meet couples they are
interested in. Remember, Swing Clubs, Social Events and Dance Parties
are attended by other couples with there to experience the same
fun and excitement your are. Say hello to everyone!
- Respect for others is everything. You want the time and respect
and so do other couples. When walking around the play rooms keep
your voices low if you must talk, and stay away from giggling and
laughing. Some new couples deal with open sexuality by giggling.
This is distracting and makes you look rather childish.
- Most Swing Clubs allow you to bring your own booze and mixers.
Be sure not to over indulge. Too much alcohol might impede male
performance or make you look undesirable. You really don't want
to get into a sexual experience and not be able to perform because
you had too many drinks. Plus, you really don't want to get nabbed
on the way home by the local police department either.
- Viagra and Livetra are GREAT for some situations. Ask you doctor
for advise. Some males have no problems at home with their hottie,
but with new people and with people watching, the game has changed!
Many guys can experience problems with "performance anxiety" when
hooking-up with a new women with the wife is there. Happens to
the best of us from time to time. Best way to prevent this from
being a problem is to be prepared.
- If you go into a play room and wish to join, watch for a little
while so you don't look too aggressive. Look for signs! Other couples
will look at you if they are interested in you. Some may just want
to be watched to make their sex more exciting. It's all good, go
with the flow and don't try to change what people are looking for.
If it is meant to b, it will happen right then. NEVER touch anyone
without a node or some acceptance. It is hard to describe in text,
but once you are there, you will know when the time is right. If
you are interested in another couple, place yourself near them
and play with your mate. If there is interest and you are all naked
playing, it makes it real easy to intermingle.
- When you are finished playing, have the courtesy to clean up
after yourself. Nobody likes to step in a used condom! Your mother
is not going to pick up after you! Have respect for the club and
the other members, pick up after yourself... including the wrappers.
- Remember... when you are done, others may still be engaged in
the most exciting sex of their life. Don't sit around and talk
about your lousy football team! Quitely leave the room, get a fresh
drink and talk out the encounter with your mate.
Conventions are a blast! Too much fun for sure. A convention can bring THOUSANDS
of horny, hot couples together in the same spot at the same time. You can only
imagine what can come out of that! Fact is, conventions are huge social events.
They provide thousands of like-minded couples the opportunity to socialize with
others, dance and drink. Most conventions do not allow open sexuality, not because
the promoters don't like it, because it is still illegal to have sex in public
places. The promoters would love for you to have sex whenever you so desire.
That would ensure your repeat attendance for sure, but it just can't happen.
There are a few cases where the entire facility is taken-over by the convention
and the hotel management is less restrictive... but not very often.
In most cases you find and converse with other hot couples in these events and
return to a hotel room with them for some hot follow-up action. It is just human
nature that takes over after a few drinks, some hot dancing and open minds. Generally
the friendship starts with introductions from other couples, or girl-girl action
initiated by the female of the couple. Girls can easily walk up and touch other
girls, where this is not an accepted practice for guys until after the friendship
begins. Who made these rules anyway? A little touchy-feely, and few sexy dances
and you are bound to be on your way to a room if that is in person set of rules.
Some conventions have PARTY SUITES. These are fun and make it very easy to engage
in sex with other couples without the need to go through the social thing. You
go into the party suites and people are having sex literary everywhere. That
is the fun and excitement of the whole thing. The room smells and feels like
sex. You can elect to attend such a party suite or stay in the social dances
...your choice. Some prefer getting to know people better and some are there
just for the sport-sex, girl-girl action, threesomes and other fun.
If you have never been to a Lifestyles Convention... this is a MUST GO event
for you. You need to experience what it like to be part of a party of 2000 horny
couples all dressed sexy and feeling sexy. Best advise to you is to get into
the game. Same hello to everyone that walks by you. Introduce yourself and look
available. People that huddle off in corners will never get hit on and not have
a good time. You are there to meet people and have a good time... so by all means,